This is a episode script for Connor Lacey's Super Adventures of Total Drama All-Stars.
(The episode begins with a far away view of the island)
(Zoom into the inside of the boy’s side of the loser cabin, on one bunk bed: Brick on the top bunk and Mike on the bottom bunk. On the other bunk: Sam on top bunk and Cameron on the bottom bunk. There’s a mosquito buzzing around, and Mike is mumbling in his sleep as his personalities)
Mike: (Mumbling in his sleep, as Chester) There's a storm 'a coming dagnabbit! (Gasps, now as Svetlana) I'm scared! After all zese years, he's going to return! (Gasps, as Vito) Ayo, how we gonna stop this goombah? (Gasps, as Manitoba) Hush it, mates; Mike is waking up! (Wakes up, as his normal self, still groggy; looks around) Uh… huh, wuzzat? You guys say something?
(McQueen and the cars are sleeping in a dusty old banged up garage at the side of the cabin)
Lightning McQueen: (annoyed) Mater, would you quit it with the snoring? Some of us are trying to sleep.
Mater: Sorry.
Lightning McQueen: Ugh. I just hope we win today's challenge and get into that hotel garage.
Ash Ketchum: But, what I wanted to know is why Ireland Rebel X have saved Gwen yesterday?
Chef: (From right outside the cabin door) YO! UP AND AT’EM, MAGGOTS! PIPIN’ HOT BREAKFAST SERVED IN YO FACE!!! (Suddenly a bucket of gruel was tossed at the three of them)
Lightning McQueen: Come on, not the bolt. Watch the bolt!
Agumon: (eating the gruel) This stuff tastes good though.
(The bloated mosquito sloshing, it smashes through the boys’ window and flies past the girls’ side, we pan in on the girl’s cabin; with Zoey on the top and Courtney on the bottom bunks of one bed, and Dawn on the top and Sierra on the bottom bunks of the other, are sleeping peacefully. A sudden flash from Sierra's Smartphone makes Courtney bolt up; awake)
Courtney: (Screams) what the heck?!
Zoey: (From the top bunk) Courtney? What's wrong?
Courtney: What's wrong is we're sharing a cabin with a super fan with a bad case of crazy! (Sierra is tapping away at her Smartphone)
Sierra: (Giggles crazily) Hey, Courtney; I've updated the sleeping section of your picture gallery on my fan-site, wheee!
Fluttershy: That's cool, Sierra.
Iris: What I wanted to know is why did Ireland Rebel X saved Gwen yesterday.
Sierra: We may never know. Maybe you girls and the other boys ask him and find out.
(Confessional: Sierra)
Sierra: I hate to break Chris's rules about smuggling in special items like my cell phone; (proudly shoves her phone into the camera, the background being a photo of Cody in the shower, terrified and holding a towel to himself) -But I have to keep my TD blogs current! (Starts typing) “Zoey's even sweeter than she is on TV. Courtney is even..." (Pauses and looks at the camera) "Courtney-er than ever! (She finishes typing) It's better this way; last time I had a teensy bit of a problem with Internet withdrawal. Without this link to Cody-Wody, I'd probably lose my mind!"
(Confessional: Twilight Sparkle)
Twilight Sparkle: I have a feeling that Sierra maybe on to that. Maybe, we can ask Ireland Rebel X why he saved Gwen yesterday.
(Confessional ends)
Sierra: (Carressing her phone as Courtney and Zoey look confused) Oh Internet, never leave me!
Chef: Room service, suckers! (Tosses another bucket of sludge through the door, Zoey and Courtney scream out as it covers them)
Courtney: What's wrong with you?
Chef: (Peeks his head through the door) Here's breakfast! (Chuckles as he scoots away)
Sierra: (Grinning, waves at Chef) Thank you, Chef!
Courtney: (Speaking to Zoey, wiping the gruel off her face) We've got to win the next challenge and get into that spa hotel!
Sierra: (Happily eating the gruel) True love sure does build up an appetite!
(So, the Ireland Rebel Alliance, the Legion of Cartoon Heroes and the Reform Squad have come to Ireland Rebel X)
Batgirl (DCSHG): Ireland Rebel X, can we talk a minute?
Ireland Rebel X: Sure.
Robecca Steam: Why did you help Gwen yesterday? You do realize she's on an opposing team, right?
Ireland Rebel X: I know. But, even though she's an opposing team, she's still our friend. And, thanks to me as Ripjaws, she's still in competition.
Twilight Sparkle: I guess that's what happens when the opposing team member is being saved by some creature in a robot suit!
(Confessional: Frankie Stein)
Frankie Stein: I guess, Twilight just said that, so that Ireland Rebel X can tell us who he really is.
(Confessional ends)
(Ireland Rebel X pressed the button and took off his suit to reveal Connor Lacey)
Connor Lacey: Hi guys.
Twilight Sparkle: Connor Lacey?
Clawdeen Wolf: You're alive?
Shaggy: How?
Connor Lacey: Well, after Galvatron have sent me down to the lava, when he attacked our ship, I was acting crazy. And, I thought my time has ended for sure. But, I transformed into Heatblast to protect myself from the lava and Chris sealed my inside the Ireland Rebel X suit to heal, just like he did to Alejandro.
Draculaura: But are your legs asleep like Alejandro's?
Connor Lacey: Nope, my legs are wide awake, Draculaura.
Frankie Stein: Then how do you explain that your Ultimatrix is still working?
Connor Lacey: I guess, it must be lava proof.
(Twilight Sparkle looks at Connor Lacey and hugs him)
Twilight Sparkle: I'm so glad you're alive.
Connor Lacey: (Hugs her back)
(The entire team hugged him)
Frankie Stein: Welcome back, Connor.
(Cut to the spa hotel)
Scott: Oh I am digging this. I can't wait to be a millionaire. I got up at five AM to watch the releasing of the doves, and I'm just gonna say it, (Tearfully) it was beautiful. (Blows his nose into a napkin)
(Duncan sits down next to Scott)
Duncan: Yeah, this is the life! (Scott grabs the plate of sausages and starts chowing it down without utensils) And if we keep winning challenges, we can live like this all season! (Raises glass, Scott does the same) To villainy! (They clink their glasses)
Gwen: (moping) Yeah, villainy...
Duncan: (Slightly concerned) 'Sup with you, Pasty?
Gwen: (Looks up, stuttering) Wha-oh, uh, nothing, just, uh, y'know, wondering how Lightning's doing on Boney Island?
(Cut to Boney Island with stormy skies, lightning crackling up above. Lightning is crouching on a rock and clutching a stick, determinedly scanning the water below him. A catfish swims by Lightning's rock, and he swings his stick into the water, sending the fish flying out of the water and landing on the beach)
Lightning: Ha, fish, you've been struck by Lightning! (One of the monster geese that inhabit Boney Island flies by, grabbing the fish in its mouth) Oh no you don't (leaps off the rock and grabs the other end of the fish, playing tug of war with the goose, the goose pulls him off camera. A bunch of punching and painful squawks are heard. Lightning walks back on screen carrying the battered dead catfish in his hand, victorious) WHOO! (Eats the fish in one bite. Then his stomach gurgles) Sha-dang, this fishy is swimming back upstream! (His cheeks bulge and he runs behind a rock to puke)
(Cut back to the hotel, Jo is now sitting in between Anne Maria and Duncan. The butler lays a plate of steaks in front of Jo)
Jo: I just hope Lightning doesn't find the invincibility statue, if we don't vote him off soon, he'll be too strong for us to beat later!
Scott: (Contemplating) So maybe we should do it right away...Throw the next challenge.
Jo: Pfft. And, give up all this? No way!
Scott: (Snickers) either way, this is sweet! You know what I slept on last night? (In delight) A pillow! Filled with feathers! (Frowns) Back on the farm, it's a burlap sack filled with small animals. You ever have a pillow bite your face?
Duncan: (Looks around) not recently.
Jo: I'd like to enjoy my breakfast now. And that will require you to stop talking.
Galvatron (G1): I highly doubt we're going to lose.
Granny Goodness: I agree with you, Galvatron.
Nefera De Nile: I know he's a jerk and all, but I've gotta admit, that Lightning makes me hotter than July.
Jackson Storm: He's still our ally and we need one of our Vultures to win.
(Cut to the spa hotel's massage table, where Alejandro is in his speed-o, getting a leg massage from a female intern; Heather sitting nearby)
Heather: Quit hogging the masseuse!
Alejandro: (sighs) I'm sure her hands are magical, if only I could feel them.
Heather: (Looking suspiciously at him) Seriously? Your legs are still asleep?
Alejandro: I don't know if they'll ever wake up. (Looks up at Heather; eyebrows covered in tape, his face much cleaner than it was last episode, and his hair back to the length it was in World Tour) I was squashed into that robot suit for an entire year, which you would know had you ever texted me!
Heather: It's not like I ever texted you! (Notices the covered up eyebrows) Are you getting your eyebrows waxed? Wow...
Alejandro: They call it man-scaping because it is very manly. And I didn't text you, because I was trapped in a robot suit!
Heather: (look of regret, trying to find the words) Well... Ugh...Whatever!
(Heather grips one of Alejandro's waxing tapes. Cut outside the hotel as a sickening rip is heard, followed by Alejandro’s scream)
(Confessional: Heather)
Heather: Puh-lease, this 'my legs don't work' thing is obviously bogus, he just wants sympathy! But news flash, I am not falling for him (Panicked) -it... not falling for it!
(Confessional: Alejandro)
Alejandro: I've never found Heather to be more radiant! Her glossy locks, her perma-frown, the way the hair on her upper lip catches the light when she yells at me- (Pauses realizing what he said) Keep in mind; I was in a robot suit for a year.
(Confessionals end)
Chris: (Through the intercom) Attention Campers, It's challenge time! Get your hineys down to the beach, pronto!
Heather: (Smirking) Shall I fetch the baby carriage? (Gasps as Alejandro starts walking away on his hands) Show off!
(Meanwhile, to the villains)
Pascal (Miniforce): Now, don't forget, we need one of our Vultures to win the competition, so that we can use the million dollars to destroy the Ireland Rebels.
Lashina: I know they'll win. What if there were another way? Mal. One of Mike's personalities. A real punk of the city. He could be a great Villainous Vulture, with our guidance.
Naare: N-n-name in the lights Livin' royal Take a look at these Beautiful diamonds!
Jackson Storm: And they're shining And we're climbing To the top of this kingdom Nobody can stop us!
Gaia Everfree: Oh, oh, oh If having everything that I want is wrong I don't wanna be right
Oh, oh, oh
Midnight Sparkle & Lord Stoker: Sitting high on my throne In control This is some kind of life!
Black Arachnia (Animated): Empire, empire! Naare & Van Hellscream: Reign over everything Take over everything!
Queen Chrysalis: Empire, empire! Cassidy & Scourge (G1): Reign over everything Take over everything!
Moanica D'Kay: Take over the world You and I together Nobody can stop us, stop us, Building our
Empire, empire! The Music Meister: Reign over everything Take over everything!
Granny Goodness: Empire, empire Building us an empire, yeah, yeah Empire, empire Building us an empire, yeah, yeah
All I want is everything Cause we're kings and queens Why pretend to be anything less I'm a goddess!
Galvatron (G1): Don't be modest, When we run this kingdom It's gonna be monstrous!
Naare: Oh, oh, oh If having everything that I want is wrong I don't wanna be right! Oh, oh, oh
Midnight Sparkle & Lord Stoker: Sitting high on my throne In control This is some kind of life!
Black Arachnia (Animated): Empire, empire!
Cassidy & Galvatron (G1): Reign over everything Take over everything!
Empire, empire! Reign over everything Take over everything!
Take over the world You and I together Nobody can stop us, stop us Building our
Empire, empire! Reign over everything Take over everything!
Empire, empire Building us an empire, yeah, yeah Empire, empire Building us an empire, yeah, yeah
Lashina: We just want the power The money and the power Take it if we got a lot of Got the world towers
We just want the power The money and the power Stepping on you cowards We got the world towers
Villainous Vultures: Empire, empire Reign over everything Take over everything!
Empire, empire Reign over everything Take over everything!
Take over the world You and I together Nobody can stop us, stop us Building our,
Empire, empire Reign over everything Take over everything! Empire!
Eclipso: Destiny awaits us.
Dark Opal: But, if this Mal guy doesn't cooperate?
Hawk Moth: Oh, you're right. Scott just has to get Chester, Svetlana, Vito and Manitoba Smith out of the picture first.
Galvatron (G1): Yes. And then, when Mike drops the boulder on himself, we can bring back a legend. (Laughs evilly)
[Galvatron (G1)] Mal was such a legend. Though he's long gone, his story lives on.
[Granny Goodness] If we bring back that legend, his big villain smarts gives us a new start.
[Lokar] Yeah. Mal will help us live with all his great advice. No more playing nice. No more playing nice.
[Galvatron, Granny Goodness and Lokar]
Let's bring back a legend. A legend, to help our fight. Let's bring back a legend. A legend of darkness tonight.
[Naare and Jackson Storm] No one in Total Drama, could possibly dream of our big scheme.
[Moanica D'Kay and the Music Meister] They'll all be astounded when the Heroic Hamsters' done and our victory won.
[Bigs and Bluefur] We just need Mike and a boulder for our surprise.
[Pascal, Hawk Moth and Makino] Then we'll make Mal rise. We will make Mal rise.
[Galvatron, Granny Goodness, Lokar, Naare, Jackson Storm, Moanica, the Music Meister, Bigs, Bluefur, Pascal, Hawk Moth and Makino] Let's bring back a legend. A legend to help our fight. Let's bring back a legend. A legend of darkness tonight.
[Galvatron (G1)] Come on, everyone. All together!
[The Villainous Vultures] Let's bring back a legend. A legend to help our fight. Let's bring back a legend. A legend of darkness tonight. Let's bring back a legend. A legend of darkness tonight.
Pascal (Miniforce): You villains know what to do. We'll participate in the beach challenge and give Scott some instructions.
Galvatron (G1): You got it, Pascal. Let's go, Vultures!
(Cut to the beach, the teams on two platforms, minus Lightning; there is a line separating sides of the beach made in stone, and Chris is sitting in his own stand similar to announcer boxes at game stadiums, wearing a red beret, a red ascot, and sunglasses. Gwen climbs up on the villains’ platform, and Duncan winks at her, only to be not noticed)
Chris: Ooh, somebody's invisible! (Chuckles) harsh! TV couples, is it ever a good idea? (Duncan takes another look at Gwen, who secretly winks at Duncan)
(Everyone (including the villains) looks at Connor Lacey and were shocked and amazed to see him)
Duncan: Wait, Connor?! What's he doing here?
Gwen: I thought he was gone forever.
Alejandro: Chris, did you seal him up in the Ireland Rebel X robot suit the same way you did to me?
Chris: Yeah. Couldn't resist giving it another shot.
Teeny Imperiaz: So, that means, Scott is telling the truth!
Nefera de Nile: What do you mean?
Lena Luthor: Scott told us what happened at the mine challenge in Connor Lacey's Super Adventures of Total Drama Revenge of the Island. He said, Ireland Rebel X has a crack and inside him there's Connor Lacey. So, that means, Connor survived the lava from the Hawaii competition.
Djinni "Whisp" Grant: Oh. That explains it.
Lokar: Heather! You will pay for your false report to Emperor Mavro about Connor's demise!
Galvatron (G1): However, you can redeem yourself.
(Confessional: Heather)
Heather: Okay. So, I did lie to Emperor Mavro about Connor's demise. So what? I can make sure, Connor stays dead in the finale.
Connor Lacey: (Over Megaphone) I doubt it, Heather.
(Confessional ends)
(A horn honks as the former Boat of Losers speeds by, Lightning performing a perfect summersault and landing with ease on the Villains’ platform)
Scott: (Prodding Lightning with his elbow) Any luck finding the invincibility statue?
Lightning: (Smugly flexing) No need, I am an invincibility statue!
(Confessional: Alejandro)
Alejandro: He is so arrogant! I might understand it if he had THIS face (Points to face), but he does not have THIS face.
(Confessional: Lightning)
Lightning: Arrogant? Be fair now; look at me. (Flexes his muscles) Sha-yeah!
(Confessional ends)
Chris: Bonjour, mes campers! Some of you will recall our Season 3 Parisian 'Find and Build a Sculpture' debacle. Well, this time, our interns have buried 3d puzzle pieces all over the beach. Nine pieces per team; find all your pieces and assemble them on your platform to recreate one of the landmarks visited on our world tour. First to finish, wins.
Zoey: Sam? You okay?
Sam: (Groans) Feeling woozy. Cut. Kind of drained a lot. Oh, not sure why.
(Confessional: Pinkie Pie)
Pinkie Pie: Wow. He doesn't look so good.
(Confessional ends)
Chris: Since the Villainous Vultures won the first challenge, they get to dig with shovels! Incoming!
(Chef, who is still in the Boat of Losers, tosses 7 shovels at the villains. The shovels fly through the air, Heather flinches to avoid the shovel till Duncan catches it, as do Alejandro (Still on his hands) and Jo, Scott is hit in the face with his. Gwen covers her eyes in fear, but Lightning catches the shovel and hands it to her)
Lightning: (Catches two shovels without looking) Sha-yoink!
Heather: (walks up to Lightning, annoyed) Um, shovel please!
Lightning: Nuh-uh, I need both! When this one gets tired, I'll use this one!
(The camera cut to Gwen as a sharp thwack is heard, Heather walking off with a dented shovel, and Lightning with a shovel shaped dent in his face, falling over)
Sam: Hey, where are our shove-- Ah!
Chris: And getting on and off your platforms will be challenging, due to the moats (Jo pokes at the sand with her shovel, making the moat appear) that are filled with-
Sam: (Screaming) Crustaceans!
Chris: (Giggles) I don't know why, but it gets funnier every time.
Lightning: No big thing for Light-oh-ning! (Jumps off the platform) Sha-bam! (He lands safely, but a board springs up from the sand and conks him on the face, launching him into the pit, the other villains, except Duncan, look confused and concerned. Duncan just smile)
Chris: And you might wanna watch out for booby traps in the sand.
Mike: What are we supposed to dig with?
Chris: Sorry, shovels are for winners only. (Laughs) I guess you'll have to use your hands. Your challenge starts now! (Pulls out an air horn and blasts it)
(The Hamsters still on top of the platform [Zoey, Mike, Cameron, Courtney and Sierra] huddle into a small group)
Zoey: We should divide our area into sections, and each dig in one!
Rainbow Dash: Great idea, Zoey.
Courtney: No, let's separate the beach into quadrants and each pick a quadrant!
Cameron: That's exactly what Zoey said.
Serena: Duh!
Courtney: Then... good! We'll use the plan that Zoey and I came up with!
Connor Lacey: And, I'll help you guys out as... (Hits Ultimatrix)
Tigatron: Tigatron!
Zoey: (Puts her hand in the center) Go team!
The Reform Squad/The Legion of Cartoon Heroes/Mike/Cameron/Ireland Rebel Alliance/Sierra: (Put their hands in the center) GO TEAM!!
Courtney: (Groans and puts her hand in the center) Yeah, yeah, yeah, can we start digging now?
(Confessional: Courtney)
Courtney: What's with the lovin'? Hello, it's called Total Drama, not Total Friendship!
(Confessional ends)
(By now the villains are on the beach digging, except for Jo and Heather)
Jo: Strategy, people! Stra-te-gy! We should start from one end, and dig to the other one in a straight line!
Heather: (Getting in Jo’s face) And what if the pieces are all at the far end, huh, huh?! We need two lines that push towards the center. Right, guys?
Lightning: (Runs past them) Ain't nobody telling Lightning where to dig! I'm my own man! (Standing in the ocean trying to “dig” into it)
(Confessional: Lightning)
Lightning: Sometimes when my tummy's empty, my mind ain't full. Stupid Boney Island fish! (His cheeks bulge again)
(Confessional: Gwen)
Gwen: (groans) I can't believe Lightning made it to last season's finale! Does he ever sha-shut up?!
(Confessional: Frankie Stein)
Frankie Stein: "Sha-shut up." (Laughing) That's a good one.
(Confessional: Lightning)
(Lightning is facing the toilet, puking)
(Confessional ends)
(Cut to the Heroes’ side. Sierra is digging like a mad dog; the others are not so enthusiastic. Cameron discovers a beeping red light, he touches it explodes suddenly, sending him flying backs and clothes flying everywhere)
Cheetor: You need to be more careful.
Cameron: Right.
Chris: (Grinning) Eww, Chef's dirty laundry! (Cameron pulls a piece of underwear off his face, about to barf) Pretty stinky!
(Cameron tosses the dirty underwear away, and then gasps as he sees a fedora on the ground. Grinning, he walks over to Mike with the fedora)
Cameron: Here, we could use some of Manitoba Smith's treasure hunting skills right about now.
(Cameron puts the hat on Mike, making him gasp. He stands up smiling confidently as Manitoba Smith. His arms start spinning like a wheel and dives into the ground, sending the ground into tremors. He comes up seconds later with a piece of the puzzle in his hands: a white base of a statue)
Manitoba: G'day, beauty! (Tosses the piece onto the platform. Manitoba walks up to Zoey and sits next to her) Phew, looks like the real treasure is right here beside me! (Laughs, winking awkwardly) Wink-wink.
Heather: Fine. We'll work in a circular motion, towards the center.
Lashina: (Whispering into Scott's ear)
Jo: No, start with the corners, then move to the center, and zigzag!
Gwen: (Sighs annoyed) Some team.
Heather: Exactly! And a team without a leader is like a horse without a head; it just runs around, blind.
Gwen: I'm pretty sure a horse without a head, doesn't run anywhere.
Jo: (Smirking) Agreed, which is why I should be this team’s commander!
Heather: No, I should!
Jo: Let's let the team decide.
Heather: Fine! (Jo and Heather walk away from each other, calling and whistling for different teammates)
Gwen: (Growls) I give up-whoa! (Trips and falls to Alejandro’s feet)
Scott: (to Lashina) You want me to do what?!
Lashina: Trust me, it's a brilliant plan.
Alejandro: (Gazing into her eyes) I hope you know that I appreciate your efforts. You are as wise as your skin is translucent.
(Confessional: Gwen)
Gwen: I know he's evil, but... (Swoons, starts fanning herself) Oof, those eyes!
(Confessional: Lightning)
(Lightning is still puking in the toilet)
(Confessional ends)
(All the villains are lined up, Jo and Heather standing in front of them on opposite ends)
Jo: (Holding up her shovel) Attention team! I am your commander!
Heather: No, I am! (Jams her shovel back into the sand, a small clang is heard) I found a piece! (She digs it out, revealing a black statue base. Heather picks it up and starts carrying it towards the platform)
Jo: (Runs over to Heather, grabs the other end of the piece) You'd never have found it without me! (They tug at it until they accidently drop it on Jo’s foot, she screams)
Heather: (Smirking) Oops, sorry. (Jo pushes Heather into the moat; crabs swarm her)
(Confessional: Galvatron (G1)
Galvatron (G1): Nice one, Jo. Nice one.
(Confessional: Evil Juniper Montage)
Evil Juniper Montage: Soon, Mal will rise up again. And, when he does--
(Confessional: Jetstorm (BM)
Jetstorm (BM): We'll appear and be ready to take our revenge on Connor Lacey. (Laughs evilly)
(Confessional ends)
(Close up on Chris)
Chris: (Whispering) An hour has passed and the teams are still tied, one/all. Which raises a pertinent question, (The camera zooms out on the entire beach, Chris is now screaming) WHAT IS TAKING SO LONG!
(The campers all yell back; at some point Lightning yells “I’m Amazing!!”)
Chris: Blahblablah, whine, whine, whine; Hurry up! I have dinner plans!
Tigatron: Okay. And, you don't have to bellow your voice.
(Cameron walks by, accidentally stepping on a platform that sends him flying. Scott laughs at him until Cameron falls on top of him, sending him skidding. Cameron gets up and runs off, leaving Scott behind. When Scott gets up, he finds an uncovered piece of the puzzle)
Scott: Alright! (Tosses the piece up onto the platform)
Chris: And that's two for the villains!
Cut over to Zoey attempting to lift an uncovered piece unsuccessfully; until Manitoba runs over, still smirking)
Manitoba: That's alright, sweetheart; don't strain yourself, allow me! (Starts to pull at the piece instead)
Zoey: (Slightly touched) Well, if you insist...
(Suddenly, a cannon pops out of the sand, Manitoba ducking as it shoots out a boxing glove, missing Manitoba and instead hitting Courtney into the crustacean pit, making her scream and run out of the pit. Brick smirks slightly in triumph)
Gwen: (Smiling as she pulls out another puzzle piece) Yes! Got one!
Duncan: (Walking over) Way to go Gwen- (Suddenly a platform pops out of throwing sand in his face, causing Gwen to giggle)
Jo: Finally! (Pulls a piece out of the hole)
Lightning: (Jumps in, snatching Jo’s piece) Lightning to the rescue! Way to go, me! (Runs off)
Jo: Hey! Come back here with that!
Sam: Check it out guys, I've found-- (a trap hit him in the kiwis) (high-pitched) --another one.
Chris: (Offering Chef a bowl of cashews) Nuts?
Lightning: (Pulls out a small puzzle piece) Ha, too small for Lightning! (Tosses it away, hitting Jo and sending her into the crab moat, where she mutters incoherent swears as the crabs get her)
Manitoba: (Tossing another piece of the statue, a familiar-looking head, up on the platform) Another! It's like taking vegemite from a roo! (Smirking to Zoey) I could show you how sometime.
Zoey: (Nervously) Heh, no thanks, with Mike maybe. (Walks off)
Manitoba: Yup, she's a loyal one! Mike knows how to pick 'em.
Lightning: (Carries two pieces on his arms, throws them up with the others. Starts talking to his biceps) aren’t you beautiful! (Kisses them) Look at gorgeous you! (Kisses the other biceps) Sexy beast!
(Scott steps over the line between the two sides, whistling innocently. When the Heroes aren’t looking, Scott pokes holes into the ground, on the third poke a clang is heard. Scott digs and finds one of the Heroes’ puzzle pieces. Snickering, he digs a hole on the villains side and starts reburying it)
Manitoba: (Looking at Scott suspiciously, gets in his face) What are you up to, kookaburra?
Scott: (Smugly yet innocently) Whatever do you mean?
(Manitoba glares and sticks his finger in his mouth then scoops the sand where Scott had dug with his finger. He licks the sand off his finger, his eyes widening, then he reaches deep into the sand and pulls out the piece that Scott buried)
Manitoba: Ha! (Pulls Scott closer by his t-shirt, smirking) Nice try, you wily dingo!
(Scott steps back, pressing a hidden pressure pad in the sand, releasing a swarm of bees)
Scott: (Panicking) Bees... BEES!
Stompa: Stompa no like bees!
(Scott hastily swings around and whacks Manitoba on the head with his shovel, sending him falling into the dirt and knocking him unconscious)
Zoey: (Voice gets fainter) Mike? MIKE! MIIIKE!
(Zoom in to the inside of Manitoba/Mike’s mind. Inside reveals a small room made out of pink brain matter, with a large picture of Mike adorning a wall, and a table where Vito, Chester, and Svetlana are playing cards)
Svetlana: (Tossing her cards down) Go vith the fishing!
Vito: Ayo, it's go fish, not 'fishing'!
(Suddenly, Manitoba falls from the ceiling)
Chester: Aw, that can't be good...
Manitoba: (Stands back up) Hey, do you feel that? ...The Malevolent One... He's coming!
(The other personalities shriek in horror. Then they turn to the portrait of Mike, which quickly burned away to a shadowy silhouetted picture of Mike, with hair drooped over one eye and an evil smirk. As the camera pans back to reality, to the unconscious Mike, Zoey’s voice becomes more clearer)
Zoey: Mike, Miike! Oh please be ok, Mike! (Zoey is kneeling next to Mike)
Mike: (Groans awake. Sits up to rub his head) Ughh, my head...
Zoey: (Concerned) No, stop, you need to rest!
Mike: (Standing back up, grabbing his fedora) No, I'm ok... C'mon, we got to go back to digging... (He puts the fedora on as he walks away, Scott still running from the bees in the background. Mike’s eyes widen in realization) Huh, weird, I can't find Manitoba...
(Heather watches Alejandro, who digs up another piece. His leg suddenly twitches)
Heather: (Grinning) Aha, I knew he was faking it! (Just then, a crab crawls out from under his leg, revealing it to be the reason it moved. Heather now looks sad) Oh...
(The crab glares at Alejandro and pinches his foot. Alejandro just yawns)
Jo: Hey, Leggy McLatin, nice accessory! (Alejandro notices the crab; he quickly smashes the crustacean with his shovel.)
(Confessional: Heather)
Heather: His legs are really asleep? (Pouts) Great, now I feel awful.
(Confessional: Alejandro)
Alejandro: (Smirking, a hind of laughter in his voice) It took all I had to hold in that scream till no one was looking.
(Confessional Ends)
(Back at the beach, Alejandro is holding his breath. When no one is looking, he screams loudly into the hole he has dug)
(Confessional: Alejandro)
(At that moment, Alejandro stands up, his legs working perfectly again. He shakes his hips)
Alejandro: (Smirking) Cha-cha-cha... Surprise!
(Cameron struggles to carry a puzzle piece; he walks over to a very deep hole)
Cameron: (Calling down the hole) Sierra! What are you doing? You're like twenty feet deep!
(Pan down to show that she is indeed deep in the ground, apparently having never stopped digging)
Sierra: Guess I got carried away, (Giggles nervously) I was pretending I was digging for Cody! (Jumps out of the hole) How many pieces do we have now?
Cameron: I don't know, maybe we shou- (Sierra grabs Cameron’s piece, along with Cameron himself, and tosses them both onto the platform. When he lands, he counts the puzzle pieces) We've got eight out of nine pieces!
Zoey: You guys start working on the puzzle! We'll keep digging.
Sam: Yeah, good plan. Just gotta catch my breath. (Yells)
Chris: (Innocently hiding a smirk) When we did our safety test that boat wasn't there.
Chef: As if we test these things.
(Both of them start snickering.)
Sam: Ow! Jellyfish! It stung my butt! Oh!
(While Mike, Scott, Heather, and Jo all start laughing; Zoey and Sierra look concerned)
Zoey: (To Mike) How can you laugh?
Mike: (Still laughing) Cause, the only cure for jellyfish sting is to pee on it.
Sam: (Screaming)
Zoey: Ew.
(Confessional: Sam)
Sam: Well, no one else is going to pee on me. (Laughs) Huh, that is a weird sentence.
(All eight of the found pieces lay on the platform, as Sierra and Cameron look them over)
Cameron: A book, a crown… what the heck are we supposed to be building? …Wait, I got it, these pieces make the statue of liberty!
Lightning: (Holding up another piece of the puzzle) That's seven! Let's start sha-building!
(Lightning runs past Alejandro and Gwen, who quickly follow, along with all the other villains. Lightning leaps up to the platform with little effort, Alejandro leaps, but fails to make it; his body makes a bridge)
Jo: (Walking on top of Alejandro) Coming through
Scott: (Walking on top of Alejandro) woo-hoo!!
Gwen: (Walking on top of Alejandro) sorry, Alejandro.
Heather: (Walking on top of Alejandro) keep still!
Duncan: (Walking on top of Alejandro) thanks, buddy. (Laughs)
(Alejandro just growls, only to have a crab pinch his nose. On top, the villains, except Heather, Jo, and Lightning start putting the puzzle together)
Heather: Come on people! Put this thing together already!
Alejandro: (To Duncan) Try those two together! No, those two!
Lightning: (Posing) Lightning finds the final piece! I'm a hero! It's probably a statue of me! Being me!
Gwen: It's tall, whatever it is. And boxy, like a tower... oh, Big Ben!
Zoey: One piece to go, must be in Owen's quadrant!
Sam: Sorry, guys. I'm moving as fast as I can.
Cameron: All we need is the torch! Hurry! (All the Heroes jump off the platform)
Heather: (Notices that Big Ben is missing its clock face) What's with the big hole?
Gwen: Maybe we put it together wrong...
Lightning: (Annoyed) Oh come on, just get it sha-done! (Grabs a crab, placing it where the clock would be. The crab snaps its claws, causing the whole thing to collapse)
Jo: (Groans, everyone glaring at Lightning) Way to go, Liability!
Lightning: (Defensively) Hey, it's not my fault you put it together wrong.
Alejandro: We didn't put it together wrong, there are only eight pieces!
Jo: Great. So Lightning miscounted. (Picks up shovel, she and the other villains walk back to the beach) Come on, everyone, we've still got digging to do.
Lightning: I counted seven! This is a conspiracy!
(Heather and Jo start searching in one hole)
Heather: Yeah, a conspiracy of bad counting!
Jo: Oh yeah! (Pulls out the clock face)
(Zoey and Mike try shoving Sam from the spot he collapsed on)
Lightning McQueen: The torch!
Tigatron: Alright! (Reverts back to Connor Lacey)
(Zoey pulls the piece out, the Heroes cheering her on, and she pole-vaults it at the statue, making it land safely on the now completed Lady Liberty)
Chris: The Heroic Hamsters win!
(The Villains groan in disappointment, while Mike, Dawn, and Zoey cheer)
Courtney/Sierra/Cameron: (Cheering, Sierra lifting Cameron like a doll) Spa hotel, spa hotel!
Makino: No matter. Scott did his part.
Lashina: Yeah.
Chris: Ahem, I do require a volunteer for exile duty!
Sam: This one's on me, guys, to make up for my lack of digging skills and-- (Yells)
(The Heroes walk away triumphantly. Gwen looks awkwardly at Courtney)
Gwen: Hey Courtney... (Courtney stops and glares at Gwen) I just wanted to say congrats on wi-WOAH!
(Gwen steps on another hidden booby trap, a spring shoots up launching a garbage bag flying up into the air. Gwen quickly slams her shovel into the garbage bag, sending it flying into Courtney. Courtney coughs, having rotten watermelon on her face. Chris claps sarcastically, and Courtney walks away glaring, Gwen walking after her panicking)
Gwen: That was an accident; I didn't mean to-
Chris: Gwen, Gwen, Gwen ...So evil. You are definitely on the right team.
(As the contestants are walking off the beach, Gwen looks upset)
(Cut to the bonfire ceremony at night, the villains are on the stumps, while the heroes are in the peanut gallery)
Chris: Welcome Hamsters, sit back, enjoy the show. Vultures, it's time for you to vote off your first villain.
(The camera cuts to Mike, his hair drops down to cover one eye, and the one that wasn't covered has dark rings around it)
Mike: (Deeper voice with a reverberating effect) One by one, they will all fall.
Zoey: Huh? Did you say something, Mike?
Mike: (Gasps, looking and speaking normally, oblivious to what he just said) Ah, no, just sitting here.
(Confessional: Duncan)
Duncan: Lightning cost us the challenge, but Jo's annoying. Tough call.
(Confessional: Gwen)
Gwen: Ugh, I don't know who to vote for. They're all evil!
(Confessional: Eclipso)
Eclipso: Well, it looks like the plan worked. Just a few moments ago, Mal popped out and that shows proof.
(Confessional ends)
Chris: (Holding the cards) The following players are safe for another day. (As Chris announces the name, the named person is tossed a marshmallow) Duncan, Gwen, Scott, Alejandro and Heather. Lightning, you're on the chopping block for your crummy math skills, and incessant bicep kissing...
Lightning: If they were yours, you'd do it too! (Kisses his biceps)
Chris: …fair enough. And Jo, you're on the block for your annoyingly pushy campaign to send Lightning home.
Lightning: You did what? (Jo smirks)
Chris: And tonight's loser is... (After the usual tense camera flashes, Jo glaring, and Lightning kissing his biceps. Chris reveals Lightning’s portrait with a red X over it) Lightning!
Lightning: (Shocked) Sha-what?
Twilight Sparkle: We really are happy to have you back, Connor.
Connor Lacey: Aw, man. It's good to be back.
(Cut to the Flush of Shame, where Lightning sits in the toilet, the Villains and Chris looking at him)
Galvatron (G1): Shame he won't be around to see Mal's come back party.
Lightning: Tossing away your strongest team member! You're gonna regret this! Especially you, Jo, you're a total sha-AAAGH!
(Suddenly Chris pushes the button, sending Lightning down the toilet)
Chris: Family show people, family show. Who else is in line for a porcelain goodbye? Find out next time on Connor Lacey's Super Adventures of Total Drama All-Stars!
(End Credits)