Beady and the Beasts/Transcript

Beady and the Beasts
Season 2, Episode 23a
Written by	LegoKyle14 & Magmon47
Directed by	LegoKyle14
Episode guide
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Here's 44th episode for season 2 from Winnie the Pooh Goes Back at the Barnyard. Here's the Transcript.

The Beginning

(The scene begins with the gang planting exploding begonias)

• Otis: Hurry, guys. Let get these exploding begonias planted before Mrs. Beady spot us.
• Abby: Otis, why are we picking on Mrs. Beady?
• Lynn: We just showing her, that mean we business.
• Olive Doyle: Yeah, she push us, we push back.
• Holly: True, but she hasn't done anything all week.
• Otis: Yeah, but what about all the stuff she did last week?

(Flashbacks to Mrs. Beady chasing and taking pictures of the gang on a tractor, interrupting their coffee break, and turned into a giant, shooting lasers)

• Pip: Uh, Otis. That last thing never happened.
• Otis: Yeah, but she thought about it.
• Piglet: I'm pretty sure she wouldn't think that.
• Sora: Definitely sure.
• Winnie the Pooh: But, why are we using exploding begonias?
• Luan: Well, Cosmo had another plant in that was seemingly harmless.
• Wanda: Seemingly harmless?
• Cosmo: What? I got the world harmless in it.
• Human Fluttershy: It wasn't harmless.
• Freddy: Hey, guys, I have a vase these would be perfect for.
• Otis: No, Freddy.

(Freddy plucks one and it exploded)

• Otis: Uh, how dumb are you?
• Freddy: Hey, here’s another one. (plucks it and it exploded)
• Donald Duck: Stop it Freddy!
• Sunset Shimmer: Yeah, Mrs. Beady will hear you.
• Mrs. Beady: (hears noises) What is going on out there? (looks outside) It’s those talking animals and those insane children. Well, this time, I’ll be ready for them.

(Back outside, the gang finished planting the flowers until…)

• Pip: Scooter!

(Everyone hides as the scooter pulls up to the curve)

• Mrs. Beady: (searches through her drawer) Where is it? (pulls out rolling pin) Aha! (heads for the door) I’ll teach those trouble makers to snoop around in my garden. They’ll never know what hit ‘em. (opens the door) GET OUT OF HERE, YOU FLITHY AN--(sees it wasn’t them) Mother Beady?
• Mother Beady: No, it’s the Queen of Shiba-- Of course, it’s me!
• Mrs. Beady: But, I thought--
• Mother Beady: Nathan, Mommy’s here! (drives in and wrecks the place) Ech, it’s like a stable in here. Why my Nathan stays with you, I’ll never know.
• Mr. Beady: Hey, Ma. (squeezed tightly)
• Mother Beady: Nathan! (looks at his face) Sweet sassafras, you look frightful. What’s this woman feeding you other than misery? You’re feeding him misery!

(Outside, though the window)

• Abby: Wow, Mrs. Beady’s mother-in-law a beast.
• Otis: I know. She’s doing our job for us. We didn’t even need exploding begonias.
• Freddy: Ooo, they we can keep’em. (picks one and it exploded)
• Narrator: Later that day.
• Mother Beady: (feeding Mr. Beady) Eat, Nathan, eat! We need to fatten you up so you can attract a suitable wife.
• Mrs. Beady: But, I’m his wife.
• Mother Beady: There are lawyers for that.
• Mrs. Beady: You know, you don’t have to be so offensive.
• Mother Beady: Nathan, what she saying? I don’t speak hag!
• Mrs. Beady: That’s it! (picks up her suitcase) I am going to take this. Ither she goes or I go.
• Mr. Beady: Let’s see--(stuffed with food)
• Mrs. Beady: I’m walking out that door unless you stop me.
• Mr. Beady: But--(stuffed again)
• Mrs. Beady: No? Alright. You had your chance. Goodbye! (leaves) 
• Mother Beady: That’s it, darling, eat up. We’ll have the locks changed tomorrow.
• Mrs. Beady: I have many dear friends who would be happy to take me during my time of crisis. (makes a call) Hello, Marsha. Nora Beady. You bag my groceries last week and I was wondering--(got hunged up) Well, I have plenty of other friends.
• Narrator: 6 hours of calling later….
• Mrs. Beady: (calling from the last page of the phone book) Fine! I don’t want to live with you either, Mrs. Roda L. Zazuzerits! Oh, whatever. I’m not going back home. I have my pride. (sees the barnyard) Why, I rather stay with those talking  barn animals and those children then give in to that shrew woman. Fortunately, the weather’s nice, so I don’t require shel--(suddenly its starts to rain and she walks towards the barn)

The Middle

• Gretchen: Sesquipedalian.
• Milly: Here's your "Saying a Word No One Else in the Room Knows" patch! Does anyone else want to try?
• Pip: Mrs. Beady Alert!
• Otis: Battle stations! Load the pie cannons! Get the mustard hose! On my signal! Ready….aim….
• Sci-Twi: (looking through scope) Wait,hold your fire! She's doing something.
• Otis: Let me see. (looks ans see her waving a white flag) Schwa-ha?
• Pip: What the heck is she doing?
• Jermey Johnson: It looks like she's surrendering.
• Mrs. Beady: Yoo-Hoo, talking animals and crazy children! I come in the spirit of peace between our peoples.
• Otis: We don't believe you go away.
• Rabbit: Otis!
• Sora: What he means to say is what do you want?
• Mrs. Beady: Please, I need a place to stay and you're my only valuable option.
• Otis: Oh, well in that case, go away.
• Mrs. Beady: Alright, I understand. I-I'll just stay out here then.
• Otis: Yes, that is much better for us. So, Poker Night, whose in?
• Abby: Otis, we can't just leave Mrs. Beady out there in the rain.
• Otis: I'm pretty sure we can.
• Ginger: She starting to shiver.
• Otis: Shiver with hate.
• Lucy: Her lips are turning blue
• Otis: Blue with hate.
• Eeyore: She's weeping.
• Otis: Weeping with hate.

(Mrs. Beady starts to cry and others give Otis the sad eye look)

• Otis: (moans) Fine.
• Abby: You're doing the right thing Otis.
• Otis: Blabbity, blabbity, Otis. Hey, hate pants, get in here!
• Mrs. Beady: Thank you!
• Otis: (stops her for a second) Under one condition: You promise never try to expose us again.
• Winnie the Pooh: Or trying to send us to Bowser again.
• Mrs. Beady: I promise. I promise!
• Otis: Okay. (lets her in)
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, thank you. Thank you all. (sees Pig) Eck, you let the talking pig live here?
• Otis: Ok, bad idea. (pushes her out)
• Mrs. Beady: No,no,no. I'll be good. I'll be the perfect guest. You'll hardly even know I'm here.
• Human Applejack: I don't know about this guys.
• Adyson: Yeah, I mean her living under the same roof with us.
• Tigger: Come on, guys. So Mrs. Beady staying with us for a few days. What's the worse that could happen?

(For the last few days, Mrs. Beady has been vacuuming all night, interrupting everyone sleep, doing exercises during meal time, and interrupting band practice with her accordion. Then next day, Mrs. Beady comes by and see the gang in the hot tub)

• Mrs. Beady: I was so wrong about all of you. Your not freaks at all. You're wonderful generous people. Can you ever forgive me?

(Everyone wasn't sure what to say)

• Mrs. Beady: Oh, what a relief. You know I feel so comfortable here like, I have nothing to hide, including these. (shows her corned foot and everyone is disgusted) Soot over! Mama coming in. (as she dips her toe in, everyone else comes out) Alright, looks like I got the tub all to myself.
• Fish: (pops out of the tub) Oh, I'm blind!

(Later that day, everyone took a barn meeting)

• Peck: Mrs. Beady's gotta go!
• Freddy: She's bumming us out!
• Pig: She's just always there!
• Abby: Her corns are HUGE!
• Otis: Guys, guys, please. We all agreed that Mrs. Beady is driving us crazy.
• Rabbit: Try insane!
• Tigger: I mean look what did to Lincoln's hair.
• Eeyore: Could be worse?
• Ferb Fletcher: There's no way it can get worse.
• Lola: Oh, it gets worse! Look, she left her day planner.
• Eeyore: See?

(Everyone looks)

• Lynn: (gasps) She's coming to all my games for the rest of the season?!
• Lisa: My conference in Sweden?! How did she get clearance?!
• Lori: She's coming on my next date with Bobby?!
• Lincoln: We have to do something. We can't live like this!
• Luna: (Pulls out a ski mask) You especially can't, brah. 
• Mia: I can't take it anymore. 
• Olivia: It would be nice to have our barn back. 
• Andera: You can say that again. 
• Emma: (sighs) It would be nice to have our barn back. 
• Mia: I'm too upset to even make a joke. 
• Goofy: We have to do something about her. 
• Otis: Agreed. So, Pig gonna have to throw her out. 
• Pig: Oh, not me Otis. I'm not good at giving bad news. 

(Flashback to when Pig is singing telegram) 

[Pig] 

You've been fired from your job 

So you can't pay the bill 

And by the way, your wife is leaving too 

• Man: Oh. 

(Flashback ends) 

• Otis: Oh, alright. I'll just do it.  

(Outside)

• Otis: Ok, Otis, you can do this. Just tell her she’s weird and gross and we don’t want her to live here anymore. She’ll totally be able to understand. (Hears weeping) What the--? (sees Mrs. Beady sobbing) Uh, Nora, quick question: Why is your face leaking?
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, talking cow, I miss my Nathan terribly. I wanna go back home, but I can’t as long as his horrible mother’s there.
• Otis: Really? Well, I was about to tell you, you can stay here forever, but if you want, maybe I can help you scare her off.
• Mrs. Beady: But that’s impossible. She’s not afraid of anything except my mother and she’s in the Galapagos taking puffins with her quilting club.
• Otis: (to audience) Or is she?
• Mrs. Beady: Yes, she is.
• Otis: No, I mean I’m gonna dress up as your mother.
• Mrs. Beady: Oh. Well, why didn’t you just say that?
• Otis: Well, I--- Nevermind.

The Ending

(At the Beady’s, Mother Beady finishes making Mr. Beady a huge feast)

• Mother Beady: Here’s lunch for my big boy.
• Mr. Beady: Oh, Ma, I’m gonna bust my breeches. Then, I’m gonna have to my big boy breeches.
• Mrs. Beady: Yoo-Hoo, look’s you back. (Mr. Beady was about to hug her until) And I brought a visitor. It’s my mother.

(Otis comes in as a Mrs. Beady’s mom)

• Mr. Beady: Yep, things are about to get ugly.
• Mother Beady: You! I haven’t seen you poisoned us last Thanksgiving. Turkey Fondue? More like Turkey Fon-Don’t!
• Otis: Lovely to see you too, dear. I didn’t realize zombies could come out in the daylight.
• Mother Beady: And you look fabulous. I guess bloated is the new bad. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m taking take of my son.
• Otis: Is that what you call it? I didn’t want to criticize, so I’ll just condemn you with my eyes!
• Mother Beady: La la la, I’m ignoring you. Open you darling, here’s comes pudding. (But Mr. Beady wouldn’t eat it)
• Otis: Look, your smothering has made him willful. Move over!  Canary goes in the coal mine. (But still refuses) Canary goes in the coal mine! (Stomps on Beady’s foot and shove in his mouth) Now he’s dead in your tum-tum.
• Mother Beady: Oh, that’s not how he likes it. (puts the whole bowl in Mr. Beady’s face) Pudding in the hole! Eat up, darling!
• Otis: Have another bite.
• Mother Beady: Don’t eat that. Eat this.
• Otis: Open up for mama.
• Mother Beady: Don’t chew, just eat.
• Otis: Don’t eat, just chew.
• Mother Beady: Don’t look at her.
• Otis: You’re choking him.
• Mother Beady: You are!
• Otis: He’s seems to be choking. Oh great, look. You got schmutz on his face. I’ll get it. (wipes his saliva on Beady’s face)
• Mother Beady: He only like his mother’s saliva! (does the same thing)
• Mr. Beady: No. Stop licking me, old women!
• Otis: (looks in Mr. Beady’s ear) Eck, look at his earwax. You call yourself a mother because I sure don’t. (pulls out giant Q-tip)
• Mr. Beady: Hang on now! What are you doing with that--(Otis started digging into his ear) THING!!!
• Mother Beady: You’re doing it wrong! (pulls out hers’) You gotta scoop it up like this! (does the same thing)
• Mr. Beady: It’s touching my brain!
• Otis: Oh, he’s so pale. He needs some color. How about a litte pinch to those cheeks. (pinches him)
• Mother Beady: You call that pinching. I’ll so you pinching.
• Otis: What a mother. When was the last time you gave him a haircut?
• Mother Beady: Well, you’re not gonna do it.!
• Otis: Oh you just watch me. (pulls out razor) Relax dear, I’m just gonna do a little snip.
• Mother Beady: Let me do it! Turn this way.
• Otis: Look, now you’re scaring him.
• Mother Beady: He has my good looks.
• Otis: He’s certainly has your mustache.
• Mother Beady: I’ll show you a mustache.
• Mr. Beady: THAT’S IT! I’VE HAD IT! OUTTA MY HOUSE, NOW!!!
• Mother Beady: But, Nathan, you need your momma to take care of you.
• Mr. Beady: I’ve already got someone to take care of me. Her! (points to Mrs. Beady) The lesser of evils! 
• Otis: Her name’s Nora.
• Mr. Beady: Right Nora.
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, Nathan! (jumps in his arms) You do care!
• Mr. Beady: That’s a little close.
• Mother Beady: Fine. I know when I’m not wanted.
• Mr. Beady: You’re just less wanted. Bye, Ma.
• Mother Beady: I’m not angry. I’m just disappointed. Mobility scooter... AWAY!!!! (drives off)
• Otis: I thought she never leave. Now, what are we doing for dinner?
• Mr. Beady: Get out!

(Later back at the barnyard)

• Mrs. Beady: I want to thank you kind animals and you generous children for restoring peace in my home.
• Otis: No problem. Just remember our deal: No more trying to expose us and get sell my friends to Bowser, right?
• Mrs. Beady: Of course not. We’re friends now.
• Human Rarity: I'm just glad this whole feud is over with. And we finally get on with our lives.
• Cosmo: Unless she changes her mind.
• Luna: Come on. What are the odds of that happening?
• Freddy: Mrs. Beady, here! You forgot your white flag.
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, thank you, Freddy. Let this be a symbol of our new and enduring friendship (suddenly electrocuted) Oh my. That was strange. Where am I?
• Otis: Mrs. Beady, are you ok?
• Mrs. Beady: (shreiks) Talking animals and crazy children! (runs off) Nathan, grab my video camera! The talking animals and crazy children are baaaaack!
• Otis: Well, it was fun while it lasted.
• Piglet: Yeah.
• Burford: So what do you want prank her with next week?
• Freddy: (grabs a begonia) Wait, here! Have a flo--(exploded) Well that happened.

THE END!