|Snotty and Snottier|
|Season 2, Episode 9a|
|Written by||LegoKyle14 and Magmon47|
Kids in the City/Transcript
Paging Dr. Filly/Transcript
(The scene begins with everyone running from Snotty Boy)
- Snotty Boy: You can run but you can't hide from the awesome power of my earwax blaster.
- Donald: Where did he even get all the wax from?
- Luan: Easy, a wax museum. (laughs) Get it? (sprayed with wax)
(Soon Snotty went after everybody. Otis took some wax to save Abby)
- Snotty Boy: Say your prayers, milky boy.
- Pooh: I don't suppose you would be sastified with a hug...instead.
- Snotty Boy: I'll show you a hug, stupid bear.
- Tigger: He's got Otis!
- Rabbit: And Pooh too!
- Mrs. Beady: Eugene!
- Snotty Boy: I'M BUSY!!!!!
- Mrs. Beady: Come home! I have a wonderful surprise for you!
- Snotty Boy: A surprise? I like surprises. You two are lucky.
- Mrs. Beady: EUGENE!!!!!
- Snotty Boy: I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME!!!!! (leaves)
- (Everyone comes out in pain)
- Tigger: Shooting at us with ear wax. How nasty can you get?
- Otis: Alright. Is everyone ok?
- Peck: Sorry I can't hear you. I have wax in my ear. AND IT'S NOT MINE!!!!
- Lola: That wax ruined my dress!
- Human Rarity: So did mine!
- Pip: I hate that kid.
- Abby: He's inhuman.
- Freddy: He's not of this earth.
- Spike the dog: He's a animal torturer.
- Donald: He's insane!
- Pig: He's a monster.
- Peck: What?
- Otis: I don't like the sound of this big surprise.
- Freddy: I don't like the sound of vaccums.
- Pip: You not bright.
- Otis: Let's follow him.
(At Mrs. Beady's House)
- Mrs. Beady: OHH!!!! There's my smooth skin little man cub!
- Snotty: Gah, what-ev-er. Where my stupid surprise?
(A boy with braces and wearing miltary clothes comes slowly from the kitchen)
- ???: Hello cousin.
(Snotty Boy screamed)
- ???: It's been a long time.
(Snotty Boy screamed again)
- Mrs. Beady: Oh, I knew you be thrilled. Bernard stopped by on his way to Explosives Camp.
- Bernard: Yeah. Family means everything to me. Auntie Nora, would you go get us one of your delicious big boy snacks?
- Mrs. Beady: Good idea, Bernard. You two have a lot of catching up to do. (leaves to the kitchen)
- Bernard: Well, well.
- Snotty Boy: Ok, look Bernard. You may have beaten me up when I was little, but I don't know if you notice, I'm not little anymore.
- Bernard: I totally understand what you're coming from. (drops a clock on Snotty) That's why, all I want is you to say that your a dirty Pilgrim.
- Snotty Boy: I'm not gonna say that.
- Bernard: Really? (literally took Snotty's nose) Got your nose! Here you can have it back now. (puts it back) Now, will you admit that your a dirty Pilgrim.
- Snotty Boy: No, I will not admit it!
(Bernard started beating Snotty Boy and as the smoke clear, Snotty was on the ceiling fan)
- Mrs. Beady: Eugene, just look as the mess you made.
- Bernard: I try to tell him Auntie Nora. He just a dirty Pilgrim.
(Snotty Boy falls down, follow by the ceiling fan, a bathtub, and a ostrich)
- Human Fluttershy: That kid was so mean to Snotty Boy.
- Otis: I know. I think I love him.
- Peck: What?
- Pip: Too bad that cousin kid can't stay until Snotty leaves.
- Otis: Maybe he can.
(In the kitchen, the telephone rings)
- Mrs. Beady: I'll get that.
- Snotty Boy: I am soooo gonna tell Auntie on you. (smack with the table) Or not.
- Mrs. Beady: Hello?
- Otis: Yes, this is Counselor Gint Mcsplooedy from Explosives Camp
- Mrs. Beady: Oh, hello, counselor.
- Otis: Sorry, to tell you that the camp has gone out of business. So Bernard have to make other plans this month. (Freddy makes a exploding sound) Whoops. That was big explosion in Cabin 9. Gotta go!
- Mrs. Beady: Ok, bye. (back to the kitchen) The man from your camp says it's gone out of business.
- Bernard: WHAT!?!? (sprayed juice in Snotty's eyes) That's not fair to me!
- Mrs. Beady: Oh, you poor thing. I know. How would like to stay here and play with your cousin all summer?
- Bernard: Well that sounds delightful. I'll go unpack.
- Snotty Boy: Auntie Nora, Bernard can't stay here. He likes a firm mattress and yours are all extra firm.
- Mrs. Beady: Oh, you just don't wanna share your Auntie Nora, no you don't. Well don't worry. You're always gonna be my favorite. Now where did I put all those guest towels. (leaves)
- Bernard: (comes in) Come on cousin. Time to play.
(Snotty runs away as Bernard walks after him)
(Snotty kept running and trips over a rock to the barnyard)
- Bernard: You can run but not well.
- Otis: This is great. This the best idea I ever had.
- Tigger: You should that kid and thing or three
- Timmy: And best of all, with Bernard around, no more getting beat up, right?
- Donald: Yeah.
- Bernard: (senses something) Wait a minute. I sense joy and innocence waiting to be crushed. (turns to the others)
- Otis: Uh, guys, we might want to get inside and hide our entrails.
- Lisa: Peace out. I'll be in my bunker. [dashes off]
- Lincoln: Everyone else to the barnyard! We'll be safe there.
(Everybody rushes into the barnyard and barricade the door.)
- Human Pinkie Pie: Are you sure that will hold him?
- Otis: Well be safe as long he doesn't have any explo--(the doors bursts)
- Bernard: Let's party.
- Tigger: Show him what your made of, Buddy Bear.
- Pooh: Fluff?
- Tigger: I think we're in big trouble.
(Bernard started beating everyone up and causing havoc)
- Bernard: Bye, silly billy barn animals and silly dumb kids. (snickers) See you all summer!
- Pig: (Head on Otis' body) Is he gone?
- Otis: (head on Pig's body) He's gone. I not even sure how he did this.
- Pig: That is one messed up kid.
- Peck: (beak on backwards) I think he had a good time.
- Freddy: (In a wall) Yes. He really felt a home.
- Abby: (in a haystack) Has anyone seen Pip?
- Pip: (Coming out of her nose) I think you have a sinus infection.
- Otis: Is everyone else ok?
- Luna: That jerk broke and slammed my head into my guitar.
- Mickey: He almost broke my ears.
- Sunset Shimmer: I don't think I can sit ever again after what he did.
- Donald: Why that little--
- Tigger: Donald, watch your words.
- Human Applejack: He lassoed me to the ceiling.
- Lincoln: I think I lost a few teeth.
- Timmy: That's nothing compared to he did to my fairies.
- Cosmo: I can't believe he had hail as the size of a mini vans
- Wanda: (one falls on her) Fully loaded mini vans.
- Otis: I can't believe I'm saying this. But we were better of when Snotty Boy was our enemy.
- Pig: Otis what are we going to do? That psycho kid gonna be here all summer.
- Human Fluttershy: Maybe we should tell Mrs. Beady about Bernard.
- Goofy: She's not going to believe us.
- Piglet: The only way she'll believe us if she see Bernard hurting Snotty Boy.
- Otis: Piglet, that's it!
- Lucy: What's it?
- Otis: Guys do you remember what Mrs. Beady said to Snotty Boy this morning?
(They think but couldn't remember)
- Pip: Do you have a thought bubble to remind us?
- Otis: I do actually.
- Mrs. Beady: (in a thought bubble) You'll always be my favorite. Favorite, favorite...
- Otis: (pops the bubble) Come on guys. I have a plan.
(Later in the forest, Snotty Boy muttering scared when he hears something)
- Snotty Boy: Who is it? Is that you B-Bernard?
- Otis: (comes in misty fog in Indian clothing) We're not going to hurt you.
- Snotty Boy: Who are you?
- Otis: I am Walks With Udders, you animal spirit guide. And these are some of my spirit guide friends. Officer Pig.
- Pig: Top of the morning.
- Otis: Two Consturction workers.
- Freddy: Hey, how'd ya doing?
- Peck: Forget about it.
- Otis: A sailor of some type.
- Abby: Ahoy there.
- Otis: Some heroes we don't know and also don't care.
- Lynn:Yeah. Hey!
- Human Pinkie Pie:I didn't know you were a physic, Lucy.
- Lucy: It's Madame Lucy.
- Otis: And this tiny lounge singer.
I'm just crazy about chestnuts.
Cause chestnuts got that zing.
- Snotty Boy: What's that sound?
- Otis: What sound?
- Snotty Boy: How come every time I heard that sound there's like fog coming out of your dress
- Otis: This isn't a dress
- Snotty Boy: Looks like a dress to me
- Otis: I asure you it's not a--
- Snotty Boy: Do you have, like, a fogger under there. You have a fogger.
- Otis: What?
(Snotty and Otis kept arguing)
- Otis: Yes, never mind that. We have heard your cries against your enemy and come to lend you our spirit power
- Snotty Boy: You don't look that powerful to me.
- Rabbit: Lynn, if you please.
- (Lynn bonks him on the head)
- Otis: If you want to defeat your enemy, follow us to the Place of Reckoning.
- Snotty Boy: The place of what?
- Sci-Twi: Just follow us.
(Late that night at the Barnyard)
- Otis: Welcome to the Place of Reckoning!
- Snotty Boy: This is looks like a stupid barn. Are you going to help bear Bernard of what?
- Human Rainbow Dash: (whispering) Not with that attitude he's not.
- Otis: Fellow spirits, anoint him with the chaste of power.
- Abby: The Snowglobe of Strength.
- Peck: The Rotting Stick of Agility.
- Freddy: This Ketchup Packet of Dexterity.
- Pig: And a garlic crouton.
- Snotty Boy: What's this do?
- Pig: Nothing. But it's excellent in salads. Really perks up a bowl of soup.
- Otis: (shushes Pig) With these tools, you shall conjure Bernard.
- Lana: (whispering) You sure this going to work?
- Snotty Boy: Muscles growing. Courage issuing forth from every pore. I...AM...CONQUERING BOY!!!!
- Eeyore: Nope.
- Narrator: The Next Day.
(Bernard pulling a cat's tail when he heard the phone ring)
- Bernard: What?
- Snotty Boy: Oh, sorry. I must have the wrong number. You're clearly a troll.
- Bernard: Eugene?
- Snotty Boy: Oh Hi, Bernard. Gosh, you really sound like a stupid troll on the phone. A troll with a wire on his head. (Bernard turns red and steam comes out of his nose) I hear you face throbbing, dear head.
- Bernard: Tell me where you face is so I can destroy it.
- Snotty Boy: Meet me at the Place of Reckoning. It's a large red building 100 yards down the road.
- Bearnard: You mean that barn?
- Snotty Boy: PLACE OF RECKONING!!!! (hangs up) Now, to summon more power. (rubs the crouton all over his body)
- Pip: Otis, are you sure about this? Bernard gonna turn him into a Snotty Burger.
- Otis: Nah, I will be back with Mrs. Beady before it gets serious. When she sees Bernard beating on her precious Snotty Boy, she'll pack him up forever and it bye-bye psycho.
- Pooh: So how long do we have until Bernard arrives?
- Lisa: Based on speed, anger and his hatred of Snotty Boy, he'll be here in about 5 minutes.
(Bernard comes through the doors)
- Pig: Uh he's here.
- Otis: Milk me. (he runs off)
- Lisa: Milk me's right. I forget about pulverization.
(Otis rides off on the scooter)
- Bernard: Time to stop your existence.
- Snotty Boy: Well, you probably don't know, that my stupid spirit guides gave me this Snowglobe of Strength, this Rotting Stick of Agility, and this Ketchup Packet of Dexterity.
- Bernard: What's the crouton for?
- Snotty Boy: It's very nice with salads. You can put it on---
- Bernard: Say goodbye to your body! (pulverizes Snotty Boy)
- Pig: He'll destroy him before Otis gets back.
- Pip: Yeah, it's too bad. Who wants nachos?
(Everyone grabs some nachos)
- Otis: I am a talking cow.
- Mrs. Beady: You!
- Otis: Here! (gives her the key) You can chase me on the scooter.
(Mrs.Beady grabs her camera and chased after Otis)
(Back at the Barnyard)
- Bernard: I called this move the Snot Knot. (tied Snotty up with his arms and legs)
(Otis runs though a wall)
- Mrs. Beady: Smile, cow!
- Lori: Hey, Beady. Bernard is hurting your nephew!
- Snotty Boy: Auntie Nora, save me!
- Mrs. Beady: Bernard!
- Otis: Yoink! (takes the camera)
- Mrs. Beady: Take your hands off my little yum-yum man! (throws a horseshoe and makes a --- lands on Bernard) I'm sending you to your mother and father and you're never coming back. EVER!!!!!! (pulls his ear)
- Bernard: I'll be back, Eugene! And I'm gonna eat your silly billy skull!
- Snotty Boy: I did it! I defeated Bernard! And you who I have to thank...
(Everyone is flattered until)
- Snotty: Me!
- Tigger: (mutters gibberish and gasps) WHAT!?!?
- Piglet: WHAT!!?!?
- Pooh: WHAT!?!?!
- Rabbit: WHAT!?!?!?
- Eeyore: HUH!?!??!
- Timmy: WHAT?!?!
- Cosmo and Wanda: WHAT?!?!
- Lincoln: WHAT?!?!
- Girl Louds: WHAT!?!?!
- Human Pinkie Pie: WHAT!!?!?
- Mickey, Donald and Goofy: What?!?!
- Tigger: Why should you get the credit?
- Snotty Boy: Because I Rock-a La Casbah. And your the worst spirit guides ever!
- Lincoln: Oh yeah, what are you do about it?
- Snotty Boy: I gonna kick you stupid spirit guide butts! (shot wax at Otis) Where's you spirit father now, huh?