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The Sun Cow
Season 1, Episode 22b
The Sun Cow
Written by LegoKyle14 & Magmon47
Directed by LegoKyle14
Episode guide
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Here's the 43rd episode from Season 1 of Winnie the Pooh Goes Back at the Barnyard.

Script[]

The Beginning[]

(The scene begins with Abby coming into the field)

  • Abby: Ok, fellas. I’m ready to play. Say, why do they call this game Cream the Critter anyway? (smacked by a ball by Otis)
  • Otis: Ha ha. I think that sums it up nice-(smacked in the face)
  • Freddy: (laughs until he was smacked in the face)

(Soon everyone throws the ball into everyone and Abby shoots the ball out of Pig’s mouth as Otis chases it)

  • Otis: I got the ball. I got it! I got it! It’s mine! Get back! I got--(slammed into a wall as the ball goes over it) impact.
  • Pip: Oh, yeah, I forgot to tell you. That new cow farm that moved in next door put up a wall last night.
  • Otis: Hey, thanks to the tiny update.
  • Winnie the Pooh: That's a big wall.
  • Scruffy: So whose gonna get our ball back?
  • Otis: Okay, guys, you know the drill. Eenie meenie miny mo, you get the ball cause your the shmo! (finger points to him) Oh man, I have constantly bad shmo finger.
  • Pip: Well, whatever let’s go get it. Come on, I’ll give you a boost. (accidently got stepped on as Otis climbs) Bad idea.

(As Otis and Pip falls over the wall they see peaceful Japanese farm scenery and sees some Kobe cows meditating)

  • Pip: Whoa, I don’t think these guys are from around here.
  • Otis: Nah, I’m sure they are. Doesn’t matter. Besides, other cultures love me. Check it out. (pulls out megaphone) EXCUSE ME!!! (throws it away) We are friends. We get ball now. (sees it on a bonsai tree)
  • Kobe Cow 1#: No, that bonsai is 3000 years old!
  • Otis: (trying to get the ball the stone platform and the tree breaks) Whoopsie. Hey, you might wanna water your trees a little more. They look a little shrimpy. (The Kobe cows are really angry) Anyway, gots to go. (Kobe Cow 1# smacks the ball away) Well, somebody a grumpy guppy. Come on, give me some happy. (plays with his face)
  • Pip: Uh Otis, he doesn’t look like--
  • Kobe Cow 1#: (flips Otis) To this dishonor, you’ll be p() over the wall. The wall which you recently scaled to achieve entrance to our property
  • Otis: (picked up by Kobe Cow 2# by the legs) No, no we get it. Don’t do the neighbor thing. We’re gonna leave now.
  • Kobe Cow 3#: (gasps) Look.

(The other cows Oh and Ah)

  • Otis: What? So I put on a few, I’m working on it.
  • Kobe Cow 1#: Bring him to the wise one!

(The Kobe Cows brings Otis and Pip to a old blind cow)

  • Kobe Cow 1#: Oh, great wise one. We brought this stranger who
  • Wise One: Silence This wise one knows all. (feels Kobe Cow 1#’s face)
  • Kobe Cow 1#: Uh, that’s me.
  • Wise One: I knew that.
  • Otis: (getting poked at) Ow. Ow. Ok that’s my eye.
  • Kobe Cow 1#: The udder. Feel the udder.
  • Wise One: Silence! The wise one’s getting to that.
  • Otis: Yeah, listen, I just--COLD HOOF!!! Oh cold hoof!
  • Wise One: (gasps) You have a extra fifth udder. Just like the sacred sun cow of legend. Below. (point to a chicken until Kobe Cow 1# directs the stick to The Sun Cow)
  • Pip: Hey, Otis. He thinks that bee sting you got the other day is a fifth udder.
  • Otis: Really? That’s weird. I’m losing consciousness. (dropped on his head)
  • Wise One: You’re coming has been prophesize. But, we must test you, to make sure if you are reincarnated sun cow.
  • Otis: Tested? No way. Guys, there’s has been misunderstand.
  • Wise One: If you pass, you will be exalted as a deity and live the rest of your life in luxury.
  • Otis: I do like me some testing.
  • Wise One: Good. We shall commence in 24 hours.
  • Otis: From now?
  • Wise One: No, from Thursday. Yes, from now!

(A few minutes later, Otis and Pip comes back to tell everyone else the news)

  • Otis: Guys! Guys! You’ll never guess whose a reincarnated sun god an---Hey, what are you doing with my stuff?
  • Bessie: 40 minute rule. You leave, we get your stuff.
  • Tigger: I got his helmet.
  • Timmy Turner: I get his video games.
  • Lana: I get his stall.
  • Lori: I call his dresses.
  • Freddy: I got his toothpaste.
  • Lincoln: That’s hoof ointment.
  • Freddy: Hmm, minty.
  • Otis: Guys, listen. The new cows next door think I’m some kind of god. Ha ha. How bout that? All I have to do is pass some dumb test, and I get to live in opulent luxury.
  • Bessie: What kind of morons would worship you?
  • Freddy and Peck: All hail, Otis.
  • Wanda: Found them.
  • Eeyore: It figures.
  • Otis: Come on, guys. Help me pass and you can all ride my co-tails.
  • Rabbit: It sounds tempting. But we're gonna have to decline.
  • Sunset Shimmer: We're fine just the way we are.
  • Abby: They got a point, Otis. We gotta it pretty good here.
  • Otis: Oh, come on. Think big. Pig, you can finally splurged on that fancy imported garbage you like.
  • Pig: You mean Gar Bage?
  • Otis: Yes. And Abby, you'll have servant to listen to your blabbity--I mean your fascinating blabbity stories all day long.
  • Freddy: Oh, can me and Peck get two connected unicycles that we can ride on together.
  • Otis: That’s called a bicycle and yes. 
  • Freddy and Peck: We’re in.
  • Otis: Great! So, you’re all with me?
  • All: Yes!
  • Bessie: No!
  • Otis: It’s unanimous! 
  • Bessie: Unanimously stupid.

The Middle[]

(Later that night, the gang searches about being a Sun Cow on the farmer’s computer)

  • Abby: Says here, the reincarnated sun cow must be completely impervious to pain.
  • Otis: My pain threshold is very high.
  • Lisa: Has to catch a fly with chopsticks.
  • Otis: Hand-eye coordination. I’m all over it.
  • Pig: And he has to fly.
  • Otis: What? That can’t be right.
  • Cosmo: Website says so.
  • Leni: Yeah, and the internet never lies.
  • Rabbit: Well, you can't believe everything you see on the internet.
  • Cosmo: Yeah, like what?

(Suddenly an ad pops up)

  • Pig: Hey, a Nigerian prince needs to deposit money in his account.
  • Abby: That poor prince. I’ll punch in the farmer’s credit card number.
  • Pig: Hang in there, your highness.
  • Rabbit: (moans)

(The next day)

  • Abby: Ok, Otis, Step 1: You gotta be impervious to pain.
  • Lisa: Like Lynn when she keeps ramming her head into stuff
  • Lynn: Yeah. Hey!
  • Sunset Shimmer: And no matter what we drop, do not move.
  • Otis: Right, give me your best shot and don't hold back. Now I know we're all friends here and you might be hesitant to--(Suddenly a piano drops on him)
  • Winnie the Pooh: Are you quite alright, Otis?
  • Scruffy: Do you feel any pain?
  • Otis: I don't feel anything.
  • Phineas Flynn: That close enough.
  • Pig: Moving on!

(A few minutes later)

  • Pip: Ok, Step 2: Catching a common housefly with chopsticks.
  • Otis: (trying to handle them) Oh man. How am I supposed to catch a fly with chopsticks if I can't even hold them?
  • Pig: Hey, good news everyone. I convince my friend, Manny the Fly to help us out. When I give the signal, Manny will fly to the end of your chopsticks so it'll look like you catch him.
  • Otis: Great idea, Pig. Let's do a practice run.
  • Pig: Show him what you got, Manny! (lets him go until)
  • Freddy: A fly! I'll get him! (smacks Manny with a newspaper)
  • Pig: Noooooo!!!!

(A few minutes later at Manny's funeral)

  • Pig: Manny was a friend of mine. In his 17 hours here on Earth, he touch so many of us. And now here to say a few words, is his brother, Theo.

(Theo the fly comes in until)

  • Freddy: A fly. I'll get him! (smacks Theo)
  • Pig: Noooooo!!!
  • Lucy: Better move on before Manny's sister comes by.

(Later, outside)

  • Pig: Step 3: The reincarnated sun cow has to fly.
  • Otis: Right, I can't do that.
  • Abby: You can do it if you just believe
  • Otis: Uh, that is wrong. Me flying is a physical imposs--(got catapulted by Abby) I'm doing it! I'm flying! I'm flying! (slams into the silo) My body's sad. (slowly slid down)

(A few hours, back at the Japanese farm)

  • Otis: (coming out of a Litter carriage) Well guys, the Sun Cow is here. What it's gonna be, hit me with a piano, fly funeral, soaring through the clouds?
  • Wise One: None of these.
  • Otis: Wha? But the internet said--
  • Wise One: Those tests are old school. These days, all Sun Cow reincarnations are determined by dance skills. Kick it. (turns on boom box and 2 Kobe shows off their skills)
  • Pip: Otis, you got served. With a bowl and a spoon.
  • Luna: Dude, not helping.
  • Piglet: Otis, what are you doing to do?
  • Otis: What am I gonna do? I'm gonna do a little thing called The Pencil Sharper. (does and the other cows are impressed) Next up, the Shopping Cart. (does that) Now, buckle up and Drive the Bus.
  • Pig: Go for the Zombie.

(Otis does that, splits and flips)

  • Wise One: Clearly, you have the skills to pay the prophesize bills. (him and the other cows started bowing)

(Later that day, Otis enjoys his life of luxury)

  • Otis: (having some grapes) Sacredly delicious. (haves a smoothie)
  • Pig: (being served garbage) Man, that is good Gar Bage.
  • Abby: (talking with a servant which whacks himself on the head with a frying pan) And people don't realize, she wasn't a amazing athlete but she affected foreign policies in so many ways. And that woman's name was Mary Lou Retton. Did you know she also rescue wolverines and release them into the wild--
  • Freddy: (riding with Peck on a bike) 2 connected unicycles coming through.
  • Wise One: It is time for The Sun Cow's sacred bath. All friends must leave.
  • Otis: Sorry, guys. What can I say. Sacred bath time. They have to remove my chosen filth.
  • Pig: Ok, Otis. Enjoy your bath.

(Everyone says goodbye)

  • Freddy: Race you back on our two connected unicycles.
  • Pip: Whoops. Forgot my cellphone. (heads back in)
  • Otis: (stepping into the bath) Aww, yeah. That's the stuff. Say, this sacred bath water smells kinda tangy.
  • Wise One: It's not water. It's teriyaki sauce. Make your meat nice and tender.
  • Otis: Oh, teriyaki sauce. Yeah, that makes per---Wha?
  • Wise One: All Sun Cows are served up as the Thursday Special at Captain Kabuki Steakhouse. It is a great honor.
  • Otis: B-b-but I'm not really the Sun Cow. This fifth udder i-i-it's really a bee bite. Guys, wait up! (runs for it)
  • Wise One: No one refuses dishonor. Restrain him!

(The Kobe bodyguards brings Otis back into the tub while Pip runs to warn everyone)

  • Pip: Red alert! Read alert! Otis, is in trouble!
  • Abby: What'ya mean?
  • Pip: They're soaking him in teriyaki sauce! They're serving him for dinner at Captain Kabuki's Steakhouse.
  • -Steakhouse!?!?!
  • -Oh I love Captain Kabuki's.
  • -I especially with their Oni Sushi.
  • -Guys!?! Did you just forget that Otis is going to be on the menu!?!
  • -Sorry.
  • Peck: Oh no. Poor Otis.
  • Bessie: Who cares? He deserves whatever he's got into. Plus more for being ugly.
  • -Man, you are heartless.
  • -I know, right?
  • -Either way, we have to save Otis.
  • Freddy: To the two-connected unicycle!
  • Abby: Wait, there's gotta be another way. What would Mary Lou Retton do? (Everyone gets irrated again) Oh, all right, fine!

The Ending[]

(Later that day, two bodyguards are playing thumb war, when a mechanical dragon came. However, a tree knocks it off the dragon apart to be the gang)

  • Pig: Whoopsie.
  • Kobe Cow 2#: They were disguising themselves as a fearsome dragon.
  • Kobe Cow 1#: Who do they think they are? Mary Lou Retton?
  • Timmy Turner: See, I told you nothing ever works when you mention Mary Lou Retton, Abby.
  • Wise One: Get them!

(Everyone charged as Pip unlocks the door as Otis burst out)

  • Otis: Stop!!!!! I shall agree to be Thursday's Special just let my friends go
  • Abby: Otis, do you know what you're saying.
  • Otis: Not really. I'm whoozing from the teryiaki.
  • Wise One: Your loyalty impresses me Sun Cow. I will release your friends if you defeat me in...blindfolded combat!

(Everyone 'Oh' and 'Ah')

  • Otis: Deal! (got a stick and was blindfolded)

(The two clashed but they weren't hitting each other but hitting everyone and everything else until Otis was bitten again by a bee)

  • Kobe Cow 1#: Wise One, he has grown a sixth udder!
  • Wise One: Impossible!
  • Otis: I told you. The other one was just a bee sting.
  • Wise One: Oh. Ha. Thousand year old egg on my face. You are all free to go!
  • All: Yay!

(Later that day)

  • Otis: Thanks for inviting us to your honorable tea party.
  • Wise One: If we are to be neighbors, we must bury all animosity. Please, allow me to pour.
  • Otis: Oh, well pour away. Just have a cup though, caffine makes me--(Wise One Accidentally pours hot tea onto Otis' legs)

THE END!

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